People sometimes ask what I mean when I say I like to keep my options open. The assumption is usually hesitation or lack of clarity. For me, it is neither.
In everyday life, keeping my options open means I do not rush into definitive yeses or nos when flexibility serves me better. My work is not rigid, and my capacity shifts. Because of that, I am careful about what I commit to, especially when it involves time. I do not promise every weekend in advance. Sometimes I genuinely do not know how I will feel or what will be required of me in the moment. I function best with room to move. I prefer presence over pressure and spontaneity over being overscheduled.
This is not avoidance. It is discernment.
Where this changes completely is in dating and relationships.
Keeping options open does not apply once I have chosen someone. I do not believe in half-choosing people. If I am in a relationship, there is no mental reserve list and no parallel considerations. The person I am with is not optional. They are chosen. That does not mean obligation or loss of autonomy. It means intention.
If I were to treat someone as an option, I would not expect them to take me seriously. Nor should they. Respect requires clarity. Commitment, when it exists, deserves to be clean.
So yes, I keep my options open with my time, my energy, and my schedule. But not with people. When I choose, I do so with my eyes open and my feet planted.
Clarity is kindness, and choice carries responsibility.
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