Writing Struggles

Hey, folks! Let me share what's on my mind. Writing has always been my thing, you know? It used to be this deep, big question, but now it's just a part of who I am. Like that moment before diving into something, thinking about life and stuff, while already caught up in good vibes.

But lately, I'm hitting a roadblock. I've got this itch to write, but now I'm doubting myself, questioning why I'm doing it. It's like waking up and realizing certain things just don't make me happy anymore, you know? Like losing interest in social stuff or avoiding crowded places – that introvert life.

The challenges messing with my writing mojo are real. Doubts are creeping in about my skills. I'm aiming to get noticed in those top-tier journals, but even with some encouraging rejections, I worry that I might never really be great at it.

Then there's the real talk about getting better seeming like a distant dream. Age, my brain slowing down, and my struggle with reading a lot got me feeling stuck. Even if I was younger, getting better as a writer seems like a big mountain to climb, and I can't even get into those long reads.

And life, oh life, it keeps messing with my creative flow – like an introvert dealing with a noisy, extroverted crowd. Writing needs focus, but real-life stuff is stopping me from going all in. Some say put writing first, but when you've got bills to pay, that dream gets pushed aside.

Let's not forget my attempt at changing up my blog to be about literary criticism. That move brought its own set of issues. Trying to understand all that fancy literary theory and history showed me the gap between what I know and what I want. Closing that gap means giving up my current life for years of academic stuff, all for a blog with just a handful of readers.

In this ongoing self-reflection, I'm torn between the love for writing, which is deep in my bones, and the feeling that it might all be pointless. Some say just write for yourself, but I want a deeper connection and a group of people who really care – a shared experience in the world of words. What do you think, guys?